OOTD - Exploring

I was sat at home today bored, so I decided to go on an adventure around where I live. Although I have lived in the village my whole life I've never really looked round properly. The village scares the crap out of me as it reminds me of the place in The Lovely Bones so I was terrified that I was going to be killed and buried in a den in the ground..

Beenie - From Australia

Camo jacket - Asos (DIY)
Redy Pinky Jacket - Topshop
Black Vest - H&M

Shorts - River Island
Tights - Tesco

Shoes - Nike Blazers

Nail Varnish - OPI Die Another Day (very chipped)

'JB' Necklace - Gift
Start Necklace - Topshop

(I hate my smile)
Eye Liner - Miss Sporty
Foundation - Rimmel Wake Me Up

 And I did fall over *embarrassed*

Muddy elbow from falling over..

 Some pictures of the scenery..

Enjoy your day..

<3

My Extensions

I have wanted hair extensions for years now and a couple of weeks i finally took the plunge. I brought mine from salon international (went with college) which meant that they were show price and discounted so they were only £25 and the clips £4!!

They are 100% Remy human hair 18" which means you can wash, dye and style them how you want. The colour is number 16, the hair is not one solid colour which makes them look more natural.
Being Remy hair means that the hair is facing the right way (the root end at the top and the tips at the end).

The hair is really good quality and is very soft, the shedding is understandable as I rushed to cut and sew the clips on meaning there will be loose hairs.

The make is Rene Duval which I don't think is available anymore as the woman at the shop said it was old stock but while I was there I brought my sister some which are the same quality, length and weight as mine they are available on the website ( link at the bottom).

The packaging.

The label.

The hair that was left to dry naturally. 

The clips and how i sewed them on.

The hair straightened, crimped and curled.

Hair Development - www.hair-development.com

Sister's Extensions - http://www.hair-development.com/shop/hair-extensions/remy-weft/i-love-remy18-20-45-50cm-100-percent-aaa-super-finest-quality-indian-remy-human-hair-100g-weft-hair/
Clips - http://www.hair-development.com/shop/accessories/hair-extensions/locktite-clips-for-weft-pack-of-10/

Enjoy your day..

<3

DIY vintage worn metal studs

I decided that I wanted some vintage looking studs to put on my clothes and didn't want to spend any money so I used the left over studs that I used on my denim vest/ cut off (How I studded my denim vest/cut off - http://www.theresbeautyinthebeast.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/how-i-studded-my-denim-vestcut-off.html ) and some nail varnish.
Studs- eBay ( around £5) (10mm silver pyramid studs) 
Nail varnish- Boots ( no more than £5)

Studs that I used.

Push the studs into an old top or paper si the nail varnish does't damage anything.

The nail varnish I used ( 17 Nail Extras Crackle Top Coat).

The nail varnish doesn't need to be applied perfectly as it will add to the old effect.

Leave them to dry.

Done.

This only took around 5 minutes to do.

Enjoy your day..

<3

Life Post two-Depression and Suicide

Depression- is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can have a negative effect on a person's thoughts, behavior, feelings, world view and physical well-being.

Suicide- is the act of intentionally causing one's own death.

No one who knows me will know anything about this because i'm the happy, quiet one who looks as if she has no problems and I make my self appear like that because I don't want any one to know what I'm really like panicky, full of self hate, depressed, worry about everything and at times suicidal.

Everyone who knows me will not know that I have been bullied even the bullies won't of realized what they were doing or what it can cause being called ugly, fat, spotty, a slut, a slag, a bitch, loser, dog.. Even being told to go cry in a corner and kill myself is hurtful and I have often held in the tears all day until I finally reach home and lock myself in my room, often staring into the mirror hating myself the way I look and the way I'am. I will sit and cry for hours thinking of how easy it would be to end it all and just leave this world.. I haven't yet but I can't even promise myself that I won't do anything in the future..

I worry about the smallest thing like getting the bus and being alone in public. In a couple of days college is having a 'hippy' day for world peace and we have to dress as hippies this has terrified me because I have no idea what to wear and what everyone else is going to wear, I have made myself ill over this and have cried I'm terrified because what if no one else dresses up and I do or if everyone else does and I don't I want to fit in and not be laughed at or talked about. I don't want to stand out just to blend in.

I had promised myself that college would be a new start for me I would be more confident and not worry about anything but nothing has changed I feel worse about myself as the pressures of looking and acting a certain way are more stronger than ever. I know deep down that I shouldn't of picked hairdressing as that requires you to be confident in yourself, not be shy and talk to hundreds of strangers its too late now I have picked my future there's no going back this is my life from now on and I have to live with it..


Many people think depression is a sign of weakness.. It is NOT!! To deal with depression takes a lot of strength and courage.

Just a smile or a hello can save someones life.

Don't be a bully you never know what it might cause.

As I wrote this I have been crying and I have thought of killing myself and going somewhere better.

Report bullying to help stop it!!

There IS help out there.. talk to someone you know (family, friends), talk to a teacher, talk to your doctor ( they know how to help).

There are many website and numbers that will help: 
www.thecalmzone.net  0800 585858
www.lifelinehelpline.info  0808 808 8000 
www.youth2youth.co.uk  020 8896 3675
www.stampoutsuicide.org.uk  
http://www.supportline.org.uk  01708 765200

Stay strong

You ARE all beautiful 

You ALL MEAN something

You are NOT pointless

Enjoy your day..

<3